poop. back and forth. forever.

I went to Iowa in a rent-a-car! It was way fun, I did everything I wanted to do!!! We ate at Thai Flavors and saw Brokeback Mountain and ate waffles made out of millet and semolina and danced and sang and got coffee at the Java House, and there were puppies and kitties and hairdye and fun times for all. I think I will do that again sometime. Rent a car and swing into town and have a weekend of fun. It's pretty cheap to do, and I feel that it renews my soul.

In spite of all the fun, I am glad to be back in what is for now my home. I healed my boyfriend of his cold with tried and true hippie remedies the night before last and in return (though this is of course unnecessary) he is taking me to Biaggi's for dinner, which is a fancy Italian place. Cause I'm a fancy Italian lady, know what I'm sayin'?

O.K. here's what I'll admit. I am feeling kind of sad at how much things have changed in only a very short time in Iowa. I walked around and while I noticed lots of new things that I liked, it was still alarming to see how many things were gone or completely changed. I guess it's good to have things renew themselves, but it's also scary. I guess it's also scarier because I'm not there to supervise the changes, I'm only dropping in every few months and finding something else they've torn down or built up. It's also unsettling to me how much the co-op has changed, which is something I know it's kind of set up to do, but still. For all the people that are still there, there are lots of new people too and I long to be home but home isn't really the home that I remember, not like it was with everyone there... Dylan and Sherene and Miranda and Joseph (do you remember those dinners? like the one when we pretended it was summer outside even though it was February?)... and this is all just a lesson to show me how to remember the past fondly without clinging to it, and to wait for the future to happen and not force it, and to enjoy the present moment, here on my floor, typing on my computer and waiting for my new and beloved friend Courtney to call so I can pick her up at the bus station, while periodically getting a witty and endearing text message from my boyfriend, and valuing deeply the fact that I can go back to Iowa City and still find a place like the co-op and all my wonderful friends that are still there even though they might not be there much longer, and not being so neurotic about things all the time!

A mao.