Let's eat breakfast firmly. If breakfast is said, it is bread. I am bread. Well eat.

I'm home. For the past several days I am here in the place that I guess is home because my family is here, but I didn't grow up here. It's quite foreign, except for the fact that all the stores are, of course, the exact same ones that I saw in Bloomingdale. Except it's MADDENING of course because everything is just a little bit different!!! The doors to Chili's are on the SIDE of the building as opposed to the front of the building, which can throw customers off and have them banging on windows for hours and weeping with frustration. Also the women's clothing section of the Target is to the left as you enter the building as opposed to the right, which makes you wonder what the hell these people are trying to prove. It's these little differences that make me completely uncomfortable in new environments. Whatever happened to consistency? Homogeny? Am I even in America anymore or is this some kind of Swedo-Commie POLICE STATE? Should I just go over to the Panera Bakery and light up a big SPLEEF? Am I in AMSTERDAMNED? COME ON, PEOPLE!

So I had a nice Christmas. I am in immediate danger of ruining it completely by staying/not staying. See, if I don't stay, my mom will be mad, but if I stay, then mom and I will fight about things. Like my attitude, for example. And the fact that I don't make beds properly. And the fact that I don't want to use the bathroom in the basement because it's cold (it IS cold). And that my car is dirty (it IS dirty). And that I don't want any pancakes (well, I DON'T!)... I should really go.

Should I go home or back to Iowa City, though? If I go to Iowa City, there will be some parties and fun people. But I will be cold in the house with the broken heat valve. And how long can I mooch sleep-space off of Chopper? And also there is some drama (best not spoken of), and it is always good to avoid drama. If I go back to Bloomington, I will be able to catch up on my reading and movie-watching because I will be UTTERLY AND COMPLETELY ALONE THE WHOLE TIME. It will just be me and the people that have no clue who I am in spite of the fact that I am a regular at the Coffee Hound.

I was going to write a big, long post about how wonderful this year has been. It truly has been. I mean, everything awful that happened turned into something absolutely great... and there was great stuff that was totally unrelated to the awful things, which means that great beats awful. Unless I'm doing the math wrong. So I'm all warm and glowy inside and then I turn on the TV at my mom's house for another eleven-plus-hour-marathon-television binge and I see the Lives of America's Richest Teen Pop Stars and now I ain't grateful for shit! Where's my fifteen-thousand dollar diamond encrusted T-Shirt that spells out B-L-I-N-G?

I HATE MY LIFE!