There is a movie theatre here that serves beer.

There is a movie theatre here that serves beer. I know what you're thinking, you're thinking, Ms. Jackson, that's a mirage! There's no way that someone would rehab an old movie theatre two blocks away from your house and run art films and documentaries all the time and serve beer there! And then after you were done thinking it, you would say it, and after you were done saying it, you would slap me and shake me, and all the while I would be insisting, NO NO IT'S TRUE! GO SEE SUPERSIZE ME WITH ME AND I'LL PROVE IT TO YOU, with tears streaming down my face, I would grab you by the upper arm and I would drag you down the street, with you protesting and fighting me the whole way, and we would finally get to the door, and the ticket lady would hold you while I punched you in the stomach, and then she'd grab you by the back of your collar and the waist of your pants and throw you into the lobby and you'd see!!!

Then the ticket lady and I would do our secret handshake and I'd go inside and buy you a beer to show you there were no hard feelings.